Hush Hush

Faye stepped out into the common room, looking around hesitantly, she had just finished unpacking her things, and was looking around, unsure of where to go, where to sit.

She was so use to... well school again. As always she had to adjest to the difference of actually being around people that wouldn't ignore her on principle.

But this year she also had to adjest to other things too...

The room was mostly empty, people were either still unpacking, or had turned in to sleep. Faye had felt to restless to sleep, so -after a moments debate with herself and deciding she didn't care - she tucked Gaurdian under one arm, flopsy under another and waddled down into the room, and into a seat. Curling the two into her chest, along with her knees, she sat there, and stared into the fire, listening to the quiet murmur of the few people sitting around her.

Ksenia sighed slightly as she made her way from her dormitory and into the common room. The room was relatively empty but you could already hear the voice of all those housemates, telling everyone that the semester has started.

The young witch has just unpacked her bag and changed out of her long heavy robes and into a pair of black pants and a simple shirt. She settled herself by the fire without looking at the people around her and tucked her knees under her chin, looking into the fire. Here she was once again, so much has happened in the summer and yet everything seemed the same. Sitting by herself trying not to remember her past once again.

Faye wouldn't say she had quite fallen asleep, but she certainly had fallen into a sleep like stupor as she at there staring, unaware of the things that were going on around her, lost in thoughts that as the longer she sat there, the more dream like... strange .... they were getting almost delerious... not making sense.

She must have actually dropped off slightly, for has she sat in the chair her grip on the more worn of the two stuffed animals in her arms had lossened, and the old bear slipped from her grasp and rolled dangerously close to the fire.

It wasn't until some sound woke the young girl with a start that she noticed that she was one stuffed friends short. Blinking around in a panic, she tried to find him.

"Flopsy," she mumbled to herself, not caring how childish she may have sounded talking to something that could not talk back. "Flopsy?"

It wasn't until the smell of slightly charred fur - an ember had jumped from the hearth and landed on the poor bear - reached her that she found her beloved toy.

Diving off the chair she grabbed her bare, using her bare hands to pat out the burn, not caring about the slight surface burns she may have been getting on her fingers.

"I'm sorry, Flopsy," she mumbled to the bare she had managed to mangle further, and pulled the toy closer to her. It wasn't until the disaster seemed to have been adverted that she noticed the other girl who had sat near to her - and realizing how childish her whole charade may have been, her face turned into a deep flush.

"Oh," she blinked at the girl. "Hello there."

Ksenia's eyebrows rose as she watched the third year girl retrieve the stuffed toy from the floor. "How old are you?" she had to stop herself from snapping at the girl. "Are you not a Hansoff? Why are behaving in a manner resembling that of a muggleborn instead that of a pureblood lady that you are!" The Prefect's voice was low as she scolded the girl. "Have some pride in yourself for Salazar's sake!"

Ksenia sighed as she leaned back into her armchair once again, watching the girl. She looked so fragile. The older Slushatel felt very fragile on the inside herself, but she had managed to hold herself together for a number of years. This girl however was different, shy. Was she raised by her parents to be like that. She knew that some purebloods were still very old-fashioned.

Faye blushed and duck her head as the girl mirrored something she knew her parents would say. Look at that, even far away from them she was ruining their name. Pureblood -Hansoff how she hated that word, hated having that last name.

Still, the bratty come back she had been making at home, seemed to have died in the face of a new voice saying the words she had heard her whole life.

"Sorry," she muttered to herself, taking the bear - her old beloved bear; there was no point in explaining to the girl that the toy had spent her childhood being more than a toy. She probably wouldn't care anyways - and hiding it behind her back. "It won't happen again."

It was funny how the words just rolled off her tongue. This girl had no real contorl over how she behaved, unless perhaps it hindered the school at all; but Faye's brain had hardwired answers to the words that this girl had spoken.

Ksenia sighed almost in frustration as she heard the girl's reply. "Have you no sense of self-worth?" she asked, stopping herself from shaking the girl's shoulders. "You can't hide like that from the world forever," she sighed as she leaned back into the chair, looking at the fire.

"You were born into a privileged family. Use that to your advantage," she added, her thoughts already far away. She was not really one to mentor other people, she had enough problems on her own plate for that to happen.

There really was no reason at all for her to do that, she would just be creating competition for herself.

"Its seemed to work for me so far," she muttered to herself as she wandered back to her seat meekly. "Sorry- I mean.... Yes?"

She blinked, unsure how to behave any longer, if she ever had been. Her usual responses would not fall under the girls critique. Eventually she just decided it was best to fall silent.

"Being born into that family doesn't mean I belong there," she muttered before she could stop herself.

Ksenia's frown deepened after the girl's answer. She supposed that there were some girls like that out there, especially in pureblood families who had every decision made for them.

"Some people do not have families," she snapped at the girl, angry. "You should appreciate what you have, because when it is taken away from you it will be too late! Your family gives you high standing in the wizarding society and you are just throwing away what you have," she almost growled, her eyes narrowed.

Faye blinked at the girl for a moment. It was obvious that she had struck some nerve with her. Maybe to was personal ... or maybe she was just like everyone else she ever seemed to meet and thought that amount of magical blood she had in her veins made a difference.

It wasn't like it helped with anything - she still could barely do magic.

"I'm sorry," she said with a flinch at the growling tone. She looked down at her hands, worrying her lip. "I did not ... I never mean to - I tried once, I really did, but they never wanted me; no matter what I did I wasn't good enough for them... so there just seemed like a point to give up."

Ksenia just looked at the girl strangely, not saying anything. She knew that the two of them had completely different understandings. "If that is how you want to do it than fine. It does not concern me in any matter. Go continue living your meaningless, mundane life," she said before turning her head to face the fire once more.

Faye bit the inside of her lip and hung her head.

Her life wasn't meaingless. It wasn't! It wasn't! It wasn't!

Was it?

"Sorry," she whispered for lord nows how many time in the past few minutes. Picking up her things, not wishing to "bother" the girl anymore - or to let her see how far her words were getting to her - she turned and left the commonroom, getting lost in the hall, to find somewhere where no one would see the slight tears glissening in her eyes.