Drawn to Me, Drawn to You

::Liddy | Kendera's appearance::


Liddy had not bothered to change into her own appearance. Sometimes, it was just not worth the effort. If she changed to her own appearance, she would have to change clothing too because wearing Kendera's clothing in her own form just felt odd.

They had still made no progress on pulling Kendera from the recesses of their mind. Liddy had finally come up with an idea of how go about doing so. It had taken a bit longer for Noah to agree. Fourth hadn't gotten a vote. Granted, Fourth didn't seem to care about the interests of any of the others.

The girl had been idly wandering Azorat when her footsteps suddenly became purposeful. It was as though something was drawing her forward, calling to her. She could not deny its pull. She didn't want to.

Her steps carried her into the square where she gazed through the crowd, trying to ascertain what had led her here. The answer was only a few feet away. Despite herself, Liddy couldn't help but feel a bit surprised.

"Roman?"

Roman sat on the edge of a fountain placed near the center of the square, poring over a book he had found in one of the many shops lining the streets of the city. He looked over the chapter index one more time. Nothing. With a growl, he stood up and hurled the book into the fountain. It couldn't be impossible. This wasn't how magic was supposed to work.

He looked at the book as it sunk to the bottom of the water, frowning as he felt someone coming. It was a really weird feeling, as if someone was standing right behind him, breathing on his neck, radiating heat, yet somehow growing closer. He felt the urge to run, but somehow he knew that he couldn't.

"Kendera," Roman said, upon turning around with a very irritated look on his face, something he subconsciously knew he'd feel bad about later, "The Universe really hates me today, doesn't it?"

::Liddy | Kendera's appearance::


Liddy simply stared at the boy for a long moment. She had... missed him. The realization was startling--especially in contrast to his greeting.

Of course he wasn't the least happy to see her. Why should he be? Liddy. Kendera. It didn't matter; they were always second-best as far as anyone was concerned.

Her irrational disappointment and hurt didn't show on her face, however. It was the stupid bond making her feel like this, anyway. It wasn't as though she ever really talked to the boy.

Tossing her head, Liddy regarded the boy with a faint sneer. "Hates you?" she responded haughtily. "Maybe it just hates me. I was enjoying a day out when I had to come across you, after all."

Roman raised an eyebrow, "Ooh, that one hurt, Ken. Really, I'm crushed." He tried not to show it, but the sarcasm was entirely feigned. It did hurt, though he didn't exactly know why. He knew that he wasn't acting like himself.

He would never be hurt by something so trivial by someone he hardly knew, and the Hrabrost was even less likely to say something worse in return. Unless, of course, he was talking to Felix, but that was completely different.

He bit his lip, looking at the girl with a little less hostility, "You've been looking for a way out, too, haven't you?" He glanced down quickly at the drowned book, "Please tell me you've found something..."

::Liddy | Kendera's appearance::


"So sorry," Liddy drawled insincerely. Part of her wanted to be sincere. It was odd, disliking the barbs she and the boy were exchanging. Generally, Liddy was a fan of barbs.

The girl regarded the boy. She was still rather displeased with the boy. In fact, she didn't imagine it dissipating any time soon.

"There's a way," Liddy confirmed. Her and Kendera's research had uncovered that much, at least. "The bond will dissolve if one of us dies. I've got things I still want to do in life, so feel free to go ahead. Otherwise, I think it's time to grow up and accept the inevitable. Don't you?

"Wait. Stupid question. Of course you don't. You're in love. At least you've had that much. Some of us aren't so lucky." Whirling about, she had every intention of stalking away again. If nothing else, she needed a moment to blink away the foolish tears that had formed in her eyes for no reason at all.

Roman looked up, feeling a very brief sense of hope at the words. His heart fell as that little piece of hope was, once again, dashed to pieces. "That's it?" He said, not even trying to conceal his pain anymore, "So we're just... stuck like this?"

The boy finally realized how far his parents had really gone. They had committed him to someone for life, and he didn't even have a say in how he felt about it. Because there was a part of him that felt relieved, even happy, at the news.

"Lucky?" Roman watched Kendera walk away, the volume of his voice rising. He took a couple of steps towards her, "You think I'm lucky? Do you have any idea how it feels to know that I'm going to have to hurt the one person I actually give a damn about? And not only that, but after school ends, I'm probably never going to see her again."

"You don't know what that feels like. That's why you're the lucky one." He felt like he was being stabbed in the chest. He was pushing Ken away, and it made him feel awful, "You might get to keep going with you're life. But me? I'll never be happy again."

::Liddy | Kendera's appearance::


Liddy spun back around to face him, expression a nasty sneer. "That's right!" she shouted in his face. "I don't know what that feels like. I had a father who beat me, a mother who wishes I didn't exist, a grandfather who doesn't care, and a grandmother who will never be pleased with me because I'm my father's daughter.

"I've never been wanted by anyone in my entire life. Not my family, not my classmates, not the boy I am stuck with the rest of my life. How can I possibly know how hard it is give that up?"

A choked sound tore from her throat, the tears she had worked so hard to suppress springing back to her eyes to stain her cheeks. "That's me." Liddy hated herself for beginning to cry in front of him, for showing such weakness. "I'm the lucky one. How very fortunate that I'm already miserable."

For once, Roman didn't feel any fear in the face of Ken's anger. Instead, he simply looked her straight on, not backing away even as she shouted right into his face. But that fear had been somehow replaced with an overwhelming sense of guilt. Who was he to say that the girl's life was less miserable than his?

He was a privileged kid who happened to get caught in an arranged marriage. Sure, there was pain, but there were millions of people who had it worse than he did. Who was he to act so self-righteous when he was really more selfish than anyone? This line of thought ended with Roman's head full of so many contradicting emotions that he felt like it was going to explode.

He stepped closer to Kendera, so that their faces were nearly touching. "I'm sorry!" He growled, the words coming out angry even though they were completely sincere.

With a cry of frustration, he walked away, his hands tugging at his hair. Then, he spun around in the direction of the fountain and sad down on the edge again, his head in his hands. "What do I do?" Roman groaned. He lifted his head back up at the girl, "Any ideas? Because I'm not going to sit around feeling sorry for myself," He stood up again, and began to pace back and forth, "I-I-I just can't. I'm- I'm not going to, I have to FIX this!" He gave a nervous laugh as he flopped back down on the edge of the fountain, "I have to."

::Liddy | Kendera's appearance::


With a force of will, Liddy managed to force her sobs back again. She watched him impassively, not bothering to wipe away the tears still streaking her face.

I'm not going to, his words rang in her ears. I have to FIX this!

And suddenly the answer was perfectly clear. In all the world and with four personalities, the truth of the matter was that Kendera Lidwina James had only one ally. She would benefit from this, too.

"Nothing," Liddy told the boy. Noah scrambled for control; even Fourth's usual efforts became tinged with a note of desperation. It was no use. Liddy's resolve locked her firmly in control. "You do nothing. It's not something you can fix."

Pivoting crisply, Liddy strode away, across the square and into the street. She followed the street to its end, reaching the broad field overlooking Lazarus Lake. Still she continued forward.

Liddy reached the beach. Forward. The water's edge. She waded in. Soon, she was in the frigid water up to her chest. Still farther...

"Nothing..." Roman whispered to himself, the thought shocking him more than anything. How could he do nothing? There had to be some way. Some way they could get out of this without dying first.

Then it came to him- hit him like a train. He didn't know how he made the connection, but somehow the boy knew. "Wait!" He said, taking off from his seat and chasing after her, "What are you doing!"

He saw her hit the water, and the sense of doom became more certain. "Kendera! You can't do this!" Roman raced into the water, his heart beating quicker and quicker as his state of panic rose, "I won't let you!"

He finally stopped, knowing that even if he did keep moving, it would be too late to reach her. In a final kick of desperation, he screamed, "LIDDY!!!" It echoed across the lake, making his voice raw. "Please," the word just barely scratched itself out of his throat, before it was too painful for him to say any more.

::Liddy | Kendera's appearance::


Liddy was not going to pay any attention to him. Of course, he was going to protest. It went against his morals or something of the like, no doubt. This was the most logical solution. If one of them had to die, it should at least be the person who was little more than a pawn in her grandparents political and social maneuverings.

Then suddenly, he was screaming her name. Not Kendera's. Hers. Liddy. She whirled towards him, features shifting in her shock. How did he-?

Unfortunately, she had reached the edge of the lake's shelf and force of her turn caused the edge of the drop off to crumble beneath her feet. The startled shriek that escaped her lips was proof that she hadn't meant to go under; not at that time. And all the many things Kendera James had been trained to do, swim had never been one of them.

And when it all boiled down, Liddy only knew what Kendera knew.

Roman felt a sense of tired relief as Kendera turned back to look at him. However, his sigh was caught in his throat as she went under, and the boy was panicked all over again. He dove into the water, digging his hands into the freezing currents.

He raced towards the spot where she fell and ducked his head under. Seeing a blur of something white-ish, he went towards it. After several seconds of frenzied swimming, Roman managed to grab hold of an arm.

Then, his lungs started to burn. No... No, I am not dying here. Roman kicked as hard as he could, the other girl's weight nearly enough to drag him down with her, but having a vampire for a mentor seemed to be paying off, at least at the moment.

But there was still the problem that he was running out of air. He looked up at the surface of the water. It was only about a foot away, he knew it was. Yet with every kick the distance seemed to be staying exactly the same, and he was getting more and more desperate.

I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die. He summoned one last burst of energy to throw him just a few more inches, and the boy kicked and kicked for all he was worth, until suddenly the air hit him like a blessing, and he could stand again, his hand still gripping onto what was at one point a blurry white arm.

::Liddy (in her own appearance)::


The water suddenly seemed so much colder now that she was fully submerged--now that she didn't intend to be fully submerged. Odd how the very thing she had determined to follow through with was now the last thing that she wanted. She didn't want to die. It didn't matter how miserable and meaningless her life was, dying had never truly been something she aspired to. How was she supposed to learn if things would ever get better if she died?

Besides, she wanted to know how he'd known her name.

She struggled at first. Of course, she struggled. Initially, it seemed she might be getting somewhere, but then she wasn't. It felt like she was drifting--drifting away. It was almost... peaceful. Even the burning in her lungs was somehow peaceful. Maybe-

And then something grabbed her arms and she was tugged upward. Initially, she did nothing, but then she kicked her feet, struggling to help. As her feet found ground again, Liddy pushed her head up out of the water, coughing violently. She clung to front of the boy's shirt with one hand. Soaked black curls sprawled across her shoulders in a tangled web as Liddy looked up at the boy, only to look away again, dark eyes falling shut in shame.

He'd seen all of the very worst of her in the span a few short minutes. And now, undoubtedly, he knew.

Roman narrowed his eyes as he stared down at the girl-who-was-but-wasn't Kendera, blinking away stray drops of water as he did so. Even though he'd never seen this girl before in his life, she felt familiar, as if he had known her for years. Maybe he had.

"Who are you?" He clenched his jaw. He had a really strong feeling- one that didn't come up for no good reason- that the answer wasn't something he wanted to hear. If it were anyone else, he probably wouldn't even ask.

He realized he was still gripping tightly onto one of her arms, and jerkily let go, "Sorry..." Roman ran a hand through his soaked head of hair, trying to wring out some of the water that had trapped itself inside. Even as a new current of freezing water rushed past him, he had forgotten all about the prospect of hypothermia. Not that it stopped him from shivering like a madman.

::Liddy::


"Don't be daft," Liddy responded, her tone lacking the bite her words implied. She swayed slightly as he abruptly released her arm, a hand reaching out to rest against his chest for balance, though only briefly. Turning, she trudged through the water and the growth along the lake bottom for the shore, expecting the boy to have the sense to do the same.

Pulling her wand from her pocket - Kendera's wand, really - she cast an effective drying charm on her attire, and them a warming charm for good measure. She may have behaved foolishly, actions more than rash, but she didn't need to get sick on top of it. She then held out her hand in a silent offer to do the same for him.

"Ho-" Liddy began, the query momentarily sticking in her throat before she managed to voice it. "How did you know my name?" Dark eyes studied the boy's face, paying as much attention to his nonverbal response as his spoken one.

Roman stared after Liddy, his expression contorted into one of deep confusion. Once she was suitably far enough away from him to make him aware of the icy water, he began to follow the girl back to the shore.

He watched her as he dried herself off, and reached for his own wand to do the same, only to realize that he hadn't the slightest clue how to preform either of the spells she had just done. With a small sigh he held his arms out beside him in a half-shrug so that she could dry him off.

Roman blinked, gawking at the girl in shock, "What are you talking about? Do you even have a name? Other than, Ken's, I mean." At this point, he had pretty much figured out that this girl was somehow a part of Kendera. Whether it was some weird rare disease, or even a changeling (not that they were supposed to exist), he knew that Ken was still in there somewhere.

::Liddy::


Liddy stared at him as though he was being particularly daft. "'Ken,' is it, now? What a nice, warm-sounding pet name. If I didn't know better, I'd think you were friends," she mocked, then shook her head.

"You called me 'Liddy,'" Liddy pointed out, her tone slow enough to be mildly condescending. "Why would Kendera respond to that, hm? Only our grandmother uses the name 'Lidwina.' Kendera hates it. Just another reminder of how she's never good enough... How we're never good enough."

Dark eyes studied the boy's face intently. They were darker than Kendera's, almost black at some angles. "Do you get it, yet?" she demanded, a smirk pulling at her lips. It wasn't an expression that would have found a home on Kendera's face, although it was rather well-suited to Liddy's. "I'll give you a hint: Kendera's not in. She hasn't been in months. Or rather, she's in, but she hasn't been steering the craft."

Roman blushed, and looked down at the ground, "Sorry, I... I didn't reali-" He cut himself short as he noticed she was joking. At least, it seemed like she was.

The boy nodded, remembering the name. He was surprised by how clear-headed he was, despite how strange all of this was. It was almost as if Kendera was really two people. Actually, that probably wasn't so far off, considering the other possibilities.

"She's not in?" He bit his lip, staring at her. "Okay, guess number one..." He said, rocking back on his heels, "Uhhh...." He pointed a finger at the sky, "She's got two personalities? Except, that doesn't explain the change in appearance. Are you just some stranger with a polyjuice potion? Yeah, but that doesn't explain you trying to drown yourself..."

He stopped talking. Roman was getting way too into this, "Or... you could just tell me so I don't embarrass myself with stupid questions."

::Liddy::


Liddy made no effort to conceal the fact that she thought the boy was starting to sound like an idiot. "It's not exactly a secret that Kendera is a metamorphmagus," she pointed out dryly. "You might remember her hair changing color with every emotion first and second year? People called her a walking kaleidoscope. Just another reason people avoided the strange girl.

"Try four personalities," Liddy declared in a bored tone. She stepped away from him, hands folded together behind her back. "And the primary happens to be recessed because... well, because she couldn't handle the stress of being forcefully betrothed to some random boy." The girl shot him a look over her shoulder. "Not that anyone cared to notice."

Roman blinked, "Right... I guess... Well, it's not like Kendera flaunts it around like a lot of kids with powers tend to do. Which is a good thing." He added hesitantly.

"Four! Merlin..." No wonder the girl acted the way he did. He'd probably do the same if there were four people living inside of him. And now Kendera was lost in the mix. If he'd only known-

Roman's eyes flashed, "Hey! Don't act like this was my fault. It's not as if I wanted this to happen." He took a couple steps towards her, "And in case you didn't notice, I tried to reach out to her. She made it perfectly clear that she wanted to be left alone."

::Liddy::


Dark eyes flashed crimson, and suddenly, there was no distance separating them. "First off," Liddy snapped out venomously, "I would never give you such credit. To say you are to blame would imply that you actually matter when, in fact, you are just another in a very long line of people people who never even cared.

"Secondly, I happened to be the one you were speaking to when you did your so-called 'reaching out.' I even remember exactly what you said," the girl sneered, continuing in his own voice as she echoed his words, "'Even if you are... completely nuts... it doesn't mean we can't be a team and... Well we can still...'

"But then you changed your mind, didn't you, Roman? Because remember what you said right after that - before I so much as had a chance to respond? Remember?" She mimicked his voice again, "'Just... forget I said anything.'" Both hands suddenly shot out as she gave him an angry shove.

"'Forget I said anything' - THAT'S what you told me!" Liddy shouted furiously at him. "That wasn't even the end of it! I told you Kendera had no friends! I told you that she didn't know how to interact with people, that the whole pureblood elitism was an act! I TOLD you, and how did you respond to my honestly, to my baring Kendera's soul?

"YOU... WALKED... AWAY!" Liddy spat. "You didn't even say a bloody single word - you just walked away!

"So, no, you might not have wanted 'this' to happen, but don't you even dare pretend that you cared or even once made a serious effort towards being our friend, because your aborted half-ass attempt does not fucking count," she snarled. "We have one friend between us, Roman Ritter, and it's not you. You're not even close." She whirled away from him, arms wrapping defensively around her middle, lip caught fiercely between her teeth in an attempt to bite back threatening tears.

You're upset, Noah stirred.

No fucking kidding, Liddy retorted. My sole purpose for being, remember? To feel all this shit. Their breathing hitched, ragged from the force of anger and hurt and vulnerability coursing through their system. Noah gave an internal sigh.

Let me take over until you're calm, coaxed the male personality. If we continue on like this, Fourth will seize control.

Liddy nodded assent, eyes falling shut as she dragged in one last shuddering breath. When they exhaled, the breath came out calmly, tears no longer threatening brown eyes. Their appearance was the same, but it was still as though someone had flipped a switch. Clearly, another had taken control.

Noah opened Liddy's eyes, gaze fixing upon Roman. He had no idea how he felt about the other boy.

Roman felt a sinking feeling with every word of Liddy's. He wasn't sure whether to be enraged or horribly, horribly ashamed. He took a step back when his own voice came out of the girl's mouth, frozen with shock. It was odd hearing it from someone else. He could hear all the little emotions, and all the fear.

He knew he was entirely to blame, not that he wanted to admit it to himself. It wasn't as if he'd meant to do this to her. But he was a coward. He couldn't even carry out a full conversation with a person without chickening out.

Liddy started shouting, and he was jolted out of his thoughts and back into reality. His eyes widened at the girl. He didn't think it was possible for her to get any scarier, but somehow she managed it just about every time they saw each other.

"You're right," He muttered, staring at the ground, too afraid to look up. He spoke again, this time a little louder, "You're right. I didn't listen. I didn't even try- not really. I mean, I was worried, I did care. Just- just not enough to do anything about it. It's all my fault."

"I'm sorry." With some effort, he managed to flick his gaze back to Liddy. She didn't seem angry at all. Perhaps she'd calmed down. He didn't expect her to forgive him. He probably wouldn't ever forgive himself for letting this happen. But maybe she'd stop yelling at him. At least for a little while.

::Noah | Liddy's appearance::


"Stop apologizing," Noah said without any heat. He was speaking English, complete with a British accent. Even if Liddy hadn't been ranting in German, her accent would have been of that land. "Knowing Liddy, she won't be forgiving you any time soon, so you're only wasting your breath. The girl can hold a grudge; especially when she's upset."

Brown eyes narrowed thoughtfully, taking the boy in. Noah didn't particularly want to focus on the upset that had been dragged to the surface; it was against his nature and always left him feeling drained to step out of his role in such a way. He was not fooled. He knew the discussion wasn't over. He simply chose to remark on something nonconsequential, instead.

"I think I'm taller than you," Noah stated. "I'm much taller than the girls, especially Liddy, although Fourth is the smallest."

He offered Liddy's hand. "I'm Noah. Liddy's too upset to talk, so you'll be dealing with me."