getting over you

She stood across the street from the house, simply staring up at it. She'd been here before, but not recently. The last time she'd set foot on this street, it'd been the summer after fifth year, and their son had been dead.

Then, she'd promised herself that she'd never come back. The memories of the Labelle family in tears and looking a heartbroken as she'd felt had spurred her on.

Just the thought of that day was making it hard to breath. Swallowing hard, she took a deep breath, eyes sliding closed as she tried to calm down.

The reasons she'd had then had made sense to her. She didn't want to see Destan's family, even now. But by not doing so, she'd never get over it. They had to have, and she wanted to know how.

So why not go to the people who missed him just as much as she did?

She wrung her hands, continuing to take deep breaths. But what if they didn't want to see her? It'd been years since they'd last talked, they might not even remember her. And then what would she do?

And they could always find her painful to look at. She'd been a friend of their son, and just the sight of her could bring back all those painful memories.

Walk across the street towards the house or leave. It was a simple choice, one between facing this and running away. And she wasn't entirely sure which one to choose.

In any other moment, Adria would not have believed that houses for wizards existed, and neither would she have bothered to wander around the unknown streets of something that is not meant to be 'real'. But every generalization had an exception, yes? She supposed this situation was something like that.

The blonde hoped that she was in the right place; she was never that great with directions. After what seemed like endless miles of walking, she breathed a sigh of relief and a smile crossed her lips as she spotted the familiar figure of her friend and made her way over to the French woman.

"Hello Marianne," the scientist called out as she neared her but the smile quickly faded as she noticed the brunette's posture. It was one she herself had harboured for quite a while, during a time without Nate and a little before Logan.

It was quite a horrendous feeling when one saw it happen to a friend.

Hesitating slightly, Adria took the professor's hand. "Hey, what's wrong? Did I come at a bad time? Should I leave? I can leave; leaving's good."

Another nervous habit she never got a hold of; saying things out loud without thinking.

Marianne shuffled her feet, continuing to stare up at the house. She could do this. She knew it. It couldn't be that hard. All she had to do was try. What did she have to lose? She had so much more to gain.

Chewing on her bottom lip, she continued to wring her hands together.

She jumped at the sound of her name, a surprised frown crossing her face as recognition flashed in her eyes. Adria? What was she doing here? But despite her surprise, a grin pulled her lips upwards.

It was good to see her friend again.

Giving the house another glance, she turned fully to face the blonde, noting the expression change on her face. Glancing down at their hands, she squeezed softly.

"Nothing's wrong. At least, not really." Letting out a small sigh, she glanced back at the house for a long moment. "No," she said sharply, staring wide eyed at Adria. "Don't leave. Please don't leave."

She didn't want to be alone, not now.

Looking at the French woman in surprise, Adria nodded her head, her grip on her friend's hand tightening. "Alright, I won't leave. No need to worry," she told in a quiet tone with a reassuring smile.

"Whose house is this?" Questioned the blonde as she stared at it as well, wondering what on earth about it could be making Marianne fret so much. Or was it empty and she just wanted to go in? Whatever the reason, she was curious to know.

Adria placed a hand on the professor's cheek, "It is going to fine, okay? I mean, I am not sure what's going on, but since I am here I'll make sure nothing bad happens."

Circumstances may be out of the blonde's control,but her friend's well-being was partly her responsiblity.

"Good," she said softly, letting out a relieved sigh. A small smile creeped across her face as she squeezed back. "Thank you. I don't want to be alone." Having Adria here was comforting. It reminded her of all the things she'd gained over the last few years instead of the things she'd lossed. She needed to work at that more, accentuating the positives instead of the negatives.

At the mention of the house, Marianne's grip on Adria increased before she let go, taking a deep breath as her hands fell to her sides. "The Labelle house," she breathed. "Destan's family. Part of me wants to go in and just - talk. I want to know how they've dealed. But I'm scared that I'll remind them of him and I just - I don't know what to do, Adria."

She offered a small smile to her friend, leaning into her touch, relieved when her heart rate stayed the same. Did this mean she was over Adria? "With you, I don't see how anything can go wrong."

Adria never had the issue of worrying about Logan's parents because in reality, it was because of his twisted family that he did the things he did. He had never told her directly, but every day that she saw him, till the day he disappeared, it was all clear as day in his eyes. But he hated to mention it, much less talk about it.

And so, she hadn't pushed him to either.

"I think you should go see them," the blonde suggested softly. "I am not saying it will be easy, but if you crave it that much, then it is better to go ahead and talk to them. It is not as if they are going to hate you for showing up at their doorstep; you were his friend after all."

Letting her hand drop to her side as well, Adria gave the smallest of smiles. "Before you decide on whether to take my advice, I should perhaps remind you that I am really not that good at these kind of things. I am only able to relate to you in the tiniest of ways because we both lost people we cared a lot about."

But a small part of her believed it was a lie; she hadn't completely lost Logan, he was still there somewhere in the world, waiting to be found.

She chewed on her bottom lip, unable to keep her gaze from dragging back to that house. It'd been years since they'd even seen her. They might not even recognize her. But there was that, chance, wasn't there? That chance that they'd be happy to see her?

Marianne had always been indecisive, always wavering back and forth between one choice and the other. There were some things she could choose with a snap of her fingers, but this wasn't one of those situations.

There were perfectly valid reasons why she would or wouldn't do this.

She glanced back at Adria, nodding jerkily. "Yeah, I know. I should, but - but what if that's why they don't like me? Because I was his friend and - and I didn't notice anything was wrong until - until -" it was too late. Marianne swallowed hard, trying to ignore the sudden wave of tears.

"That's all I can ask for, isn't it?" she whispered softly, trying to smile. "I don't want anyone to fully be able to relate to me. It's not something I'd wish on anyone."

"It was not your fault Marianne, do not think that for a second," the scientist told firmly with a shake of her head. "And if they truly believe that you cared for him, then they would not blame you even a bit." It was just human nature to ignore some signs; no one could look out for every little thing all the time after all.

Taking in a deep breath, she continued, "I apologize if I am overstepping my boundaries, but I do think that the risk is worth taking. I know it will be hard to deal if they so not like you, but at least you would not have to waste time wondering what would have happened."

"Maybe that is all Destan would have wanted from you, to just try."

Adria hoped in her mind she had not said too much, it was not in her place anyway. At the end of it, the choice was upto Marianne and all the blonde could do, was support it.

"But..." she shook her head, brushing strands of brown hair back. She needed to stop doubting herself. People had been telling her that for years, that she needed to think of herself in a better light and not to blame herself for everything that happened.

But she still had. Nothing had really stopped her. But maybe now, she could. If she just went there and talked to them - and that was assuming that they were even home to begin with - maybe she could change.

Hadn't she wanted that for years?

"I guess so," she murmured, meeting her friend's gaze. But part of her still hated that she'd missed every warning sign.

"No." Marianne shook her head wildly. "You're not. I want your advice. It's better than thinking this over alone." A small bitter smile pulled at her lips. She nodded to Adria's next words, her hands wringing together. They were true, she knew they were. But that nagging voice wouldn't leave her alone.

She glanced back at the house, running her tongue over her bottom lip absentmindedly. "I think he would've. I know he would've. And I do want this - I want this so bad. I've wanted this for years..." She trailed off, biting on her bottom lip.

Turning back to Adria, she gripped one of her hands. "Come with me? Please say you will. I don't think I can do this by myself." Marianne had made up her mind.

Adria let out a sigh, feeling guilty for not being able to help more. But what could she say or do? She was in a similar situation with Logan, and no one had been there to tell her what was right or wrong. All she had was her instincts.

So now when caring words and gestures were needed, she had no idea.

"If you really think my advice is worth hearing, then that is all I have to offer," she mumbled, her eyes looking helpless and sad. "I do not want to mislead you Marianne, but I did mean whatever I said. From my own experience, it's the best I have to say, though it may not be enough."

The blonde didn't hesitate to nod her head in the affirmative. "Of course I'll come with you, I was not going to let you face this alone." Letting the brunette go off on her own would have been hard for Adria, but luckily it hadn't come to that.

She kissed the professor's forehead and gave a reassuring smile, "It'll be fine, okay? Lead the way."

"Don't be sad," she murmured, nudging Adria softly, attempting a smile. She didn't have a reason to be sad, not really. This was her problem and her mess, and in the end she'd be the only person able to fix it. "I know," she said, nodding her head. "I trust you, Adria. You wouldn't try to hurt me, not purposely."

She was sure of that, at least. It was one of the very few things in this situation that she knew was a guarantee.

Breaking out into a large grin at the blonde's words, she wrapped her arms around her. "Thank you," Marianne said, relief shining on her face. She didn't know how she would've been able to do this alone, but with Adria at her side, maybe it'd be easier.

Blushing automatically to the kiss, she nodded once, taking her hand in hers. Glancing both ways automatically, she led them across the street and to the house. Taking a deep breath, she stared up at the door for a moment before summoning the strength to raise her hand and knock decisively on the door.

Now, all she had to do was wait for them.

"How can I not be sad when you are clearly feeling distressed by this?" The blonde muttered, still not getting the reassurance that Marianne perhaps wanted her to. She let out a relieved smile at the professor's next words, "I am glad you know that because yes, I would never hurt you on purpose or even by accident, if I had the choice."

Adria's lips remained curled upwards and she hugged her friend back just as tight. "Of course, you didn't think I was going to let you off on your own, did you?" Truthfully, the scientist was touched that the French woman trusted her enough to help her with this, because it was clearly a big deal.

And she would not let her down.

She continued to hold onto the brunette's hand in a tight grip, using her other hand to rub her friend's arm in a soothing manner, as though trying to calm herself down as well. Whatever be the result, Adria was ready to step in and Marianne if necessary.

It may not have been her problem, but anyone hurting her friend, was definitely a sign for her to interfere.

Sighing softly, she shook her head and when she looked back at Adria, a large grin had spread across her face. "See? I'm happy now. Now you have to be happy." Though the smile was the farthest thing from real, she didn't want Adria to have to feel sad along with her. "Good," she nodded. "The feeling's likewise, you know."

She shrugged her shoulders, shuffling her feet. "I don't know. Maybe part of me did. But I'm glad that you're coming with me." She smiled up at her. She didn't think she'd be able to do it without her.

Smiling her thanks at Adria, she shuffled on her feet again as she waited for the door to be answered. Maybe they weren't home. Maybe she'd just been out here worrying for far too long. Maybe - the door flung open.

Standing slightly inside was a little girl, about the age of nine or ten. She blinked up at the two of them curiously. Marianne tilted her head slightly. Destan had had a little sister, hadn't he? But for the life of her, she couldn't remember her name. About to open her mouth to ask for her parents, the girl ran off, yelling that there were people at the door.

Giving her head a small amused shake, she glanced sideways at Adria before turning back at the door at the sound of her name. Whether or not she'd wanted to, she'd been remembered.

"Hello Mrs. LeSalle," she said softly, letting go of Adria's hand to wave at her. "I - I'm sorry for just dropping by - I should've owled, but - I was in the neigbourhood and - oh, this is my friend." She nodded, gesturing towards the blonde beside her. "Um, Mrs. LeSalle, Adria. Adria, Mrs. LeSalle."

Nodding again, she opened her mouth to continue, but the older blonde cut her off, her warm brown eyes sparkling. "Mari, calm down. And it's nice to meet you," she added, smiling at Adria and holding out her hand to shake.

Looking back at Marianne, she jerked her head inside. "What about we go inside? I don't think you came over just to stay on our doorstep." Chuckling softly to herself, she led the way inside. Staring after her, Marianne slowly grinned. She wasn't angry. At least, not obviously so. Grinning at Adria, she took her hand again, leading her inside.

The scientist raised an eyebrow and shook her head, "No need to make a fool of me Marianne, but I appreciate the effort." And she did, because it was obvious that her friend didn't want her to be sad on her account. So this what it felt like to be surrounded by people who cared and whom you cared for.

Still, Adria never had that many friends, and she just wanted to show the brunette just how much her friendship was valued and how much she meant to her.

"Relax, it is going to be fine," she murmured and gave another reassuring smile. She could feel the French woman's nervousness from the grip on her hand, but she really did think it would not turn out as bad as her friend was expecting it to.

She stood patiently as the introductions, a small smile on her face as always and shook the woman's hand. "It is a pleasure to meet you as well, Mrs. LeSalle," she replied in her usual formal manner.

Seeing the grin on Marianne's face, the blonde felt infinitely better on the inside. The past few moments of tension and anticipation vanished from her mind and she went back to her lighthearted self. She followed the brunette inside, desperately hoping it'd continue to go well.

"Sorry," she murmured, shrugging her shoulders. She just didn't want someone to have to feel sad for her. She did that enough herself. She didn't want to drag other people down with her.

Marianne inhaled deeply, nodding. It had to be. She didn't think she'd be able to deal if it didn't. She was already too highstrung for her own good. If the LeSalle's turned her away...it wouldn't do anything good for her psyche.

But so far...it was going well. Great even. It was surpassing all her expectations. But that little nagging voice in the back of her head was quick to point out that Mrs. LeSalle didn't know why she was here yet.

The house had hardly changed since the last time she'd been there. The plants were older, a wall here and there was a different colour, but the overall affect was the same.

Entering the kitchen, she sat down at the rectangular table at Mrs. LeSalle's instruction. Patting the seat next to her, inviting Adria to sit, Marianne looked up at her deceased friend's mother.

"Do either of you want anything? Water? Tea?" she asked over her shoulder, pulling out her wand and flicking it at the dishes, which quickly began to wash themselves.

"I'd like water, please." Marianne said softly, twiddling her thumbs. She was still nervous. Less so than she had been before, but she just couldn't help it.

Adria sat down next to the brunette, her fingers drumming lightly against the table. It wasn't really a act of nervousness per se, but she was in a stranger's home after all and such a thing did tend to make her uncomfortable at times.

It was mostly due to the part of her that was broken because of the bullying she had endured as a child.

"I would like some water as well, thank you," the scientiest replied and looked around her surroundings, another habit that she showcased whenever in a new place. "I like your home Mrs. LeSalle, definitely has a welcoming atmosphere," she stated with a nod of her head before smiling sheepishly.

She nudged Marianne slightly on the shoulder, indicating that she probably tell the older woman the reason for their visit. There was no point in delaying the inevitable, after all. As if on instinct, she reached for her friend's hand and held it reassuringly once more.

Marianne smiled in thanks at Adria as she sat beside her. She really couldn't thank her enough for coming here with her. She just didn't know how she would've been able to do this without her. Her gaze drawn to the drumming of the blonde's fingers, she couldn't help but begin to tap out the same beat with her foot.

"Water's coming right up, then." With a smile, Mrs. LeSalle handed a tall glass to both of them, sitting down across from the duo with a cup of tea in her hand. With a murmured thank you, Marianne pulled the glass closer to herself, peering down at her reflection in it.

"Thank you, Adria," she said with a warm smile, nodding around her kitchen. "But really, I shouldn't be the one you're thanking. My husband has an eye for these things." She shook her head, an amused grin brightening up her face.

Marianne smiled softly, wrapping her hands around her glass. How could she tell Mrs. LeSalle why she'd come now? Not when she looked so happy. She'd just make her think of sad things all over again -

Glancing over at Adria, she nodded slightly, chewing on her bottom lip. But she'd come here for a reason. She had to do it. Squeezing Adria's hand, she met the woman's curious gaze. "Mrs. Lesalle," she began softly. "Well, there was a reason I wanted to visit. I just -" she swallowed hard, shaking her head.

"Destan. I - I still - I miss him. I miss him like it was yesterday. I - I can't deal. I can't move on. I can't -" She cut herself off, shaking her head.

"Hey," Mrs. LeSalle said softly, reaching out to pat Marianne's other hand. "I understand. It hurts me too. Every day I wake up and I have to remind myself all over again that I'll never see my son again."

Why had she thought that this would help? Just hearing how the other woman felt practically the same way made Marianne feel hopeless. Blinking back tears, she opened her mouth to try and say something, but the woman only continued.

"It hurts, but it's not always bad. There were hundreds of thousands of great moments with Destan. He was your friend, I'm sure you had some too." Marianne nodded, a small smile worming onto her face despite herself. He really had been an amazing friend. "Focus on those."

Brushing a strand of hair out her face, the older woman sat back, watching the professor carefully. Marianne nodded slowly, staring down at the table between them. "I do. I do. I'll try not to think about what he did. But every memory just reminds me of it all over again. I just - I want to heal but I don't know how." Looking back up at her deceased friend's mother, she shook her head. "How did you?"

Adria grinned lightly at the brunette's action and simply shook her head. She would do just about anything if it meant putting her friend at ease. And she knew that she needed the calm now more than ever. For that, she didn't have to worry because there was no way the blonde was going to abandon her.

"Your husband sounds like a wonderful man," she said, grin still in place as she accepted the glass. For a moment, she was reminded of Nate as though wondering if they would ever have a home together like this, but quickly wiped the thought from her mind.

As the scientist listened to the exchange between Marianne and the older woman, she could feel her own smile vanishing and a sadness seeping through. She never had such an opportunity to get a closure with Logan's parents and that was enough to depress her on a daily basis. If there was one thing she could change, it would be to stop his family from hating her.

And more so, stop them blaming her for his disappearance.

Unlike her situation, Adria could see the obvious affection Mrs. LeSalle held for the professor and really, who could blame her? And despite her own heart ache, she was glad that Marianne was at least finally getting a chance to talk it out with the person who would most understand.

Suddenly feeling as though she was intruding on a personal moment, the blonde got up from the table and picked up her glass. "Excuse me," she murmured and gave the other people an apologetic smile and made her way out of the kitchen.

She could feel the tears building up but she quickly blinked them away. No, this was not about her, she had to stay strong for Marianne. The brunette was counting on her as a support; she couldn't be seen as the weak one.

The scientist settled on one of the couches in the living room, feeling no hurry to leave. A genuine smile graced her lips as she remembered her best friend's words. 'We did not meet just so I can protect you. We became friends because you needed someone who can see you for the brilliant-minded, wonderful, and beautiful girl that you are. For that and more, you will always have me.'

"He is, he really is," she said fondly, grinning widely. Marianne couldn't help but smile along with her. Though she hadn't seen Mr. LeSalle in far too long, she'd gotten along well with him and could easily back the claim that he was wonderful.

And his son really had been too.

Her smile falling slightly at the thought of Destan, Marianne glanced down again, her face half obscured by her hair. Glancing up at Adria, she offered her a small smile, watching her leave.

She wanted to go after her, but at the same time Adria had told her to come here to heal. And if she got up and went after her, she wouldn't be doing that.

Turning back to Mrs. LeSalle, she met her teary gaze. "It takes time, Marianne. Healing doesn't happen quickly -"

"But it's been seven years," Marianne said miserably, laying her head on the table, her eyes squeezing shut. "Shouldn't that be enough?"

The other woman moved to sit beside Marianne, pulling her off the table to wrap her in her arms. A hand moving in circles around the professor's back, she murmured softly in her ear. "It's not an easy thing. It's gradual and slow. You have to remember that life goes on. People come and go and sometimes you can't stop them, no matter how badly you want them to stay."

Trembling, tears already beginning to fill up her eyes, Marianne swallowed hard against the lump in her throat. Shared grief was supposed to help, wasn't it? But all Marianne could think was that this hurt worse. It was like ripping the bandage off a fresh cut. The stinging hurt more than the original pain.

Adria was brought out of her thoughts by a knock on the door. As she got up to check who it was, she noticed a piece of paper being slipped underneath. Frowning lightly, she picked it up and opened the door, but saw no one outside. Looking down at the paper in her hand, her heart nearly stopped.

It was something she had seen countless of times; Logan's handwriting.

Her mind suddenly going into overdrive, her fingers trembled but she forced herself to calm down. All the various possibilities crossed her thoughts, and none of the consisted of the fact that he just might be back. She took in a deep breath and began reading the words.

Adria,

I know you will recognize this horrible handwriting of mine. Yes, it's me. I can almost imagine your expression of shock and disbelief as you read this, but the truth is, I'm back. For good. I was back last and you know who was the first person I searched for? You. I was sort of following you around today, and spotted you with your friend.

I missed you, Adria. A lot. I need to see you. Please say you'll meet me at our old spot, here in France.

-Havoc.

The nickname that the blonde had given him since he was too prone to getting into trouble and fights. Her heart rate felt like it was being trippled and she kept reading the note again and again. Shaking her head, she folded the note and kept it in her pocket. Being still in a bit of shock, she didn't even register Marianne's and Mrs. LeSalle's appearance in the living room.

Marianne hardly heard the doorbell ring, too busy trying to keep her composure and not breakdown crying. She wasn't here to sob, now was she? But she couldn't help the tears beginning to well up in her eyes.

It shouldn't be possible to hurt so much. What was the point of being able to feel like your heart had been rudely ripped right out of your chest? No physical pain she'd ever experienced could even begin to compare to this.

Her grip on the older woman tightening, she was surprised to find her pulling away. Blinking up at her, she watched her, eyes wide. She wasn't leaving, was she?

"Doorbell," she murmured softly in explanation. Nodding slowly, Marianne watched her a moment before pulling herself up and trailing after the woman.

"Was anyone there?" Mrs. LaSalle asked, tilting her head softly. Marianne frowned as she watched Adria. Was something wrong? She instantly felt like something was. Moving towards her friend, she looked at her, her expression darkening with concern. "Are - What's wrong?"

Adria was snapped back to attention by the familiar voices and she plastered a smile on her face. "The person got the wrong house Mrs. LeSalle, that's all," she told with a nod of her head. Turning to her friend, she said, "Nothing's wrong, I'm fine."

She felt as though the letter was burning a hole in her pocket. But she knew she had to calm down. Maybe it was some sort of prank, or a coincidence, or-

Jesus, what was she doing? This was supposed to be about Marianne and helping her and here the blonde was, getting anxious and worked up for something that might even be real. She was a scientist after all, facts and clues before jumping to conclusions.

"Maybe I should just leave, Mrs.LeSalle," the English woman told quietly. "I only came to support Marianne since she was nervous about meeting you and I am happy to see that you're not angry or upset with her. And it's clear she needs your help to move on, and really, I feel like I am intruding, which was not my intention at all. So maybe leaving is good."

Adria gave a sheepish smile when she realized she was just chattering away and shook her head. She mentally scolded herself for not being to help her friend more, but she knew she'd make up for it another time.

Right now, Marianne needed someone who can understand and as much as the blonde wanted to tell her about the note, she knew she couldn't.

Marianne's frown only deepened, not at Adria's words but simply the way she was acting. It was worrying her and already a dull sense of panic was creeping into her thoughts.

Mrs. LeSalle nodded in reply to Adria's words, but Marianne hardly noticed. She was already running through possibilities in her head, and none of them looked every good. Blinking up at her friend's words, the professor nodded. But a part of her couldn't believe her.

"You're leaving?" Marianne said, her eyes wide. She'd unintentionally cut off Mrs. LeSalle, but at the moment she didn't care. "I mean - you can if you want. I can't really stop you but..." She trailed off, shrugging her shoulders. She just didn't want her to.

Wrapping her arms around the blonde, she murmured in her ear, "Thank you for coming. I wouldn't have been able to do this without you."

"You're welcome," Adria replied just as softly and hugged back tight, already feeling the tears in her eyes. "You do not need me now anyway, you just need to focus on accomplishing what you came here for."

Walking over to Mrs. LeSalle, she gave her a hug as well. "Thank you for not turning Marianne away, you have no idea how much she needed this."

"I'll see you soon," the blonde waved to her friend and once she was out of the house, the tears were finally falling slowly. She didn't even know why she was crying; this was supposed to be good news, wasn't it? Her best friend was alive just like she had believed all these years and he was back.

She wiped the tears and made her way to streets. Whatever it was, she knew one thing. She had to go make sure if Logan really was here.