New Begining

Tessa was starting to feel bad that she forgot about Afonka. She was always busy with school. And she knew that Afonka was always busy too. So it wasn't all her fault. But she was missing him and wanted to spend time with him. And she wanted to make this up to him.

She smiled as she sat there with Ariel. Tessa had sent him an owl telling him to meet her here.

Afonka read her letter again as he strolled through the hallways, his large combat boots looking completely out of place in the stone walled castle. His eyes were almost blank as they slid across the parchement over and over again.

He was going to do it today. He'd been putting it off for months now, mulling over his decision over and over again. She was easily the best thing that had ever happened him, but the key word there was was. He could hardly stand himself and he wasn't going to make someone else put up with him.

Pulling open the door, he stuffed the letter back into his pocket, running his other hand through his hair. "Tessa," he said stiffly, not moving towards her.

Tessa then looked around and seen Afonka. She was so glad to see him because it has been months. This was the one person that she still had in her life. Expect for Ariel and Tessa keep her around because she didn’t have anybody else.

Her eyes lit up as she seen him. And every time she would see him she was glad that she had taken the cure for her blindness. Afonka was the reason that she wanted sight again. He was the reason why she got up every day. And she knew that he felt the same way.

She then got up and walked over to him grinning. “I see that you got my letter.” But her smile then started to fade away when she seen the look on his face.

The moment he met her gaze, he wondered if he was doing the wrong thing. The complete happiness in her face as she laid eyes on him made him feel sick. She loved him and he was still going through with this. He loved her too, he was sure of it.

But he didn't deserve her. He was going to give her up for her own good.

"I did, yeah," he nodded, brushing a hand through his hair. Giving her a shaky smile, he took her hands, leading her to the long tables. Sitting on top of the table, he patted the space beside him, inviting her to sit.

Tessa was looking at Afonka and she could tell that there was something wrong. And he wasn’t going to tell her. She loved him because he was the only thing left in her world. Tessa hasn’t seen Lena for a while and all her family that she knows of is dead. She did have Ariel but that was because Tessa still needed her.

All she wanted was for everything to end happy. But with the look that he had it might not be what she wants.

She then grabbed his hand as he led her over to the tables. But she didn’t sit on the table but on the bench. Tessa knew that it would be much safer for her to sit there. “ I missed you I haven’t seen you for a while.”

He glanced down at her, a small frown on his face before he hopped off the table, settling on the bench beside her. Despite everything, he grinned at her, his heart beating a little faster as he laid eyes on her. And then he mentally slapped himself, reminding himself of why he was here.

"I missed you too," Afonka murmured, his lips flitting upwards. "Tessa?" he asked hesitantly after a moment, looking up at her. "You know I love you, right?" Every word, every syllable was bringing him closer to the inevitable, and his eyes showed the dread he felt.

"I do. I really, really do. As much as this little heart can." He poked his own chest, a tiny smile flitting across his face. "And because of that, because I love you so so much, I'm letting you go." He hated it. Hated his words, hated himself for saying them...He looked away, blinking back the tears pricing his eyes, not wanting to face her.

"I don't deserve you. I never have. You deserve someone a thousand times better than me, Tess." He looked up at her then, his expression and voice hopelessly bleak. "I'm sorry. I am so sorry."

Tessa then watched as he sat down beside her. She knew that something was wrong because of the way that he was acting. And she knew that this wasn’t going to be for the best. And it was only bringing up how things were told her to her in the past.

She then listened as he told her that he missed her too. But he then told her that he loved her. But it wasn’t an I love you. It was you know that I love you right. And this is where she started to sigh but was still listening to everything. Tessa then heard that he wanted to let her go. And this was something that she didn’t want to hear. But he told her that he loved her so much.

That is when tears where forming up in her eyes. “When I was told my parents were dead the person told me they loved me so much. When I got a letter saying that my aunt and uncle were in a car crash and was killed, I was told the same thing.” But she then looked up and was blinking some of her tears away. But now her eyes looked like they were glass, the potion was wearing off and she didn't think of grabbing another one. And she didn't bring Ariel with her.

He wasn't looking at her because it was like she could feel his tears. “Tell me that to my face if that is what you want.” Afonka then was telling her that she deserved someone better. But she then started to cry harder. “You have no idea what is best for me. You just took the one piece of happiness I had and crushed it. You were the only person that I had left, and now you want to leave me. You promised that you would never leave me.” Tessa then was looking down at the floor and sighed. “I should have never listened to you and jumped.”

"Of course your parents loved you," he murmured, kneading his hands together. Why would someone think differently? He'd met them once, he was sure of it, and the devotion they had towards their daughter was immeasurable. "Your aunt and uncle died?" he asked, snapping his head up to blink at her. "I'm sorry," he said simply, his gaze drawn back to his hands again.

Afonka looked back up at her, chewing on his bottom lip so hard that he hardly noticed as blood began to trickle from his mouth. "I'm letting you go," he repeated, staring her dead in the eye as his filled with tears again. "Because you don't deserve me. I'm just going to hurt you in the end. Better now then twenty years down the road."

He clenched his jaw, his nails digging into the fleshy part of his hand. "I can't be the only thing that makes you happy, Tessa. You have to hobbies, stuff to do when I'm not around. You aren't friendless, I know that. I'm not the only thing out there. Having just me isn't -" healthy. Had her whole life always revolved around him? Just the idea made him feel uncomfortable. "I can't be your whole life."

The Hrabrost let out a sharp breath, his eyes sliding closed. "Listen to me. I love you now and I loved you then. What I said, I meant. But I need to this. I won't go anywhere, trust me. I'm not going to just disappear, Tess."

Tessa then hung her head down. She was looking like she was looking down at the ground. All she wanted to do was go hide and cry. “I never knew my parents and I was too young to actually remember them. They were sailing and they were lost at sea. Everybody told me that they loved me but I will never know it.” She knew that the potion was already worn off and since he was breaking up with her. That she should tell him the truth. “Yes my aunt and uncle died in a car accident.” Tessa wish that this wasn’t happening to her. But it seemed like it was all so real. “There was never cure and I have been drinking potions to see. I did it all because I knew you wanted me to see so badly.”

She was listening to him and all she was doing crying. Tessa was hoping that this was all just a nightmare but she knew that she was awake. And when she did sleep and wake that it would all be real again. That she is no longer with Afonka. Tears were flowing down her check because she cared for Afonka so much. And he was throwing it all away. “You don’t know what I deserve, I just want to have happiness and that has been taken away from me.”

He then was telling her that she had to have hobbies. And that he wasn’t the only one that was in her life. “Look around Afonka there is nobody left. None of the people who I was friends with aren’t around anymore.” She sighed even more when she started to think about how her life was going to be. And it was nothing but dark and grey. There was nothing to make her happy again. Lena was gone and it was like she had many friends. Kait was a girl that she meets in the kitchen but she hadn’t seen her for a while. And had no idea where she went. “You were my whole life Afonka, the one person that made me happy and made me forget that I am still blind.”

Tessa was listening as Afonka told her that he loved her and would never disappear on her. She didn’t know what to say but cry some more. Her heart was broken and there was nobody to put back the pieces.

"I'm sorry," he said simply, staring down at his hands. What else did he have to say? She'd lost so much, and she was losing one more. His feelings of guilt only served to make him angry. Guilty or not, he was doing this. "I'm sorry about that, but that doesn't mean I'm going to stay. I've lost people, but that doesn't people aren't going to leave." He snapped his gaze up at her, frowning. "So you lied," Afonka said simply, his eyes darkening. "You could have just said that, but instead you lied." He shook his head. "I never cared if you could see or not. I liked you for you the way you were."

Setting his mouth into a thin line, he kneaded his hands in his lap. "I'll only hurt you more in the long run. This is for the best. I promise." Reaching out, he brushed her tears away. "I'm sorry Tess. But I have to do this."

He gritted his teeth, suddenly fed up with her attitude. "Then make them! This isn't the end of the world. Stop acting like it is." How hard was it to make friends? He'd make tons of them over the years. Tessa was a nice person. She'd easily make friends. "I can't be your whole life," he repeated, his eyes flashing. "It's not healthy for one person to be that important. What if I died?" he asked suddenly, crossing his arms. "What if I died? Are you going to crawl into a hole and sob?"

He ignored her tears, pulling himself up to his feet. If he didn't, and went back to comforting her, he'd never leave. "I'm sorry, Tessa," Afonka murmured. He raised an arm, about to reach towards her. But as soon as he realized, he allowed it to fall back to his side. Giving his head a small shake, he turned on his heel and left the Great Hall.