Family Visit

Ninette bounced towards the office, humming to herself. It was her birthday, not that she had informed anyone of it. Oh she was sure that people knew it was, but there was something about Ninette that stated you did not approach Ninette unless she invited you too. She didn't want anyone to wish her well.

It was just a day like any other. She had been born that day, was another year older - of age to be specific - but she didn't wish to dwell on it.

Yet on some level, perhaps she wanted a little bit of attention, a little bit of... family. Maybe on some level she felt compelled to search out family. That seemed to be the only explanation of why she was now standing outside the headmasters door, knocking upon it and hoping that someone would response.

Looking up as the charms placed on his door indicated an approaching person Basil made a final mark on his parchment. It wasn't until a different charm signalled who was approaching that Basil allowed a small smile to slip onto his face.

"Come on in, sweetheart," he called waving the door open with his hand. It wasn't often he got to be close to his granddaughter and it was rather a surprise for her to seek him out. She was more like a daughter to him and he was rather fond of her attitude and personality. She reminded him a lot of Etta. "I would say happy birthday, but I've been told that you don't seem to like the phrase."

Strolling into the room slowly, she looked around the room with causal interest; she had hardly, if ever, spent time in the room, "You know, I think it should worry your school's disciplinary system that I've never been in here for misbehaviour."

Flashing the man a smirk, Ninette flopped herself into one of the chairs across from him, leaning her back against one arm rest and dangling her feet over the other side. "It's far too overused, I'd say. Hardly means anything - just like love or hate. Society's taken all the meaning out of any of those words."

"However, I suppose, your non-use of the term is appreciated just the same."

The Headmaster smirked. "Now, now. I believe my disciplinary system is perfectly adequate. Just because you haven't been caught doing anything wrong doesn't mean I haven't been keeping track of your actions. I keep a close eye on those I hold dear to my heart."

He stood from his chair, pulling a small box from his desk drawer. "I know that you don't believe in birthdays but I find that birthdays are very special days." Moving around the desk his boots thumped against the wooden floor. "Especially if that day is the day said person comes of age."

Sitting on the edge of his desk in front of Nine Basil held out the plain blue coloured box to her. "You mean more to me than a granddaughter, Ninette, and I know Etta feels that way as well. This is my way, I guess, of saying that. Something to help me realize that you're of age and don't need a father figure anymore." He rubbed the back of his head and rather hoped she liked the vintage watch. Thing had cost a small fortune but nothing was too good for his family.


Nine's present

Ninette returned the expression, not ashamed at all that the man would know what she had been up to; school-wise, in recent years in particular she hadn't been too out of line all things considered. There had been the brawl with Rousseau in the dinning hall, and on occasion marginal prefect power abuse, but of late she'd been...

If not subdued, then more preoccupied with at least appearing she didn't care about Marcus or being alone. This resulted in a more rampant string of her usual 'conquests'. Since more than half of those had occurred off of school grounds, she wasn't entirely sure if her grandfather knew about these either.

Blinking rather owlishly, the girl took the box silently, fingering the paper as the man spoke, glancing between him, and the box - his words stirring odd, and warring feelings within her. Ninette's shut down of emotions the day Simon, her best friend, died had extended to everyone outside of her own family. Adding new people was... difficult for her. Her friends had snuck in there somehow, though on her life she would never admit it not even to herself, and that was the reason Marcus frightened her so much. He was pushing passed those walls at a rate she didn't know how to ignore.

But the headmaster, her grandmother's new husband, her new grandfather had done something in the middle. Without terrifying her, nor allowing her to lie to herself, the man had asserted himself into Ninette's life in a way that, well she almost relied on.

"Thank you," the words were foreign to her lips; hardly ever spoken before, in that way, without bitterness or sarcasm attached to it. The watch that she now held in her hand was exquisite - and also undoubtedly expensive. Ninette knew she hardly deserved it. "It's... lovely." She blinked at it for another moment, feeling too vulnerable at the unhindered kindness coming out of her mouth, and instantly had to revert to her usual bravo, the mask of her smirk returning to her features. "Though, I think my behaviour would suggest I still need a father figure; I guess I went too many years without one."

And there it was. The girl beneath the mask that Basil had only glimpsed at a few times. He often wondered what his life would have been like if he hadn't had come over from the U.S. and had never met Etta or taken his place as Goblin King. Would he be a wandering vagabond after his band broke up or would they be on top of the world, kings in their own minds. Needless to say if he hadn't had made that trip he wouldn't have a wonderful wife, two beautiful twins, and wouldn't know the girl in front of him. A strong young woman with her whole life ahead of her. Basil wanted to help her achieve that life.

Then it was gone. The mask came back down but it sounded as if she had accepted him. "Nine." Basil knelt down in front of the girl. "If you'll let me I'd like to be that person you can come to. If you ever need help or just someone you need to talk to in order to make sense of a situation."

He gently placed a hand on the side of her knee, easy to shrug off if it was unwanted. "I'd also like to extend an offer to you. It won't be that big of a deal if you refuse but I'd like you to at least consider..." Basil bit his lip and mentally steadied himself. "At least consider living down in the Underground with myself and the others. Only if you want to though. Just for some form of stability while you finish school and adjust to adult life." The headmaster cut himself off before he started to ramble. It was a bad habit of his when he was nervous sometimes.

With a blank face, the girl listened in silence to the words he spoke, periodically glancing between the watch she still held in her hand and the hand that was on her knee. Not a single hint of any of the emotions that were cropping up inside of her flashed across her face, or in her eyes. Hiding these things was second nature to her. It left her too vulnerable.

"That would be," her voice was flat, not telling either any inclination either way. Truth was Ninette, at that first moment didn't know what she felt. Her home was just that, her home. The only place left she had concrete memories of playing with Simon, the only place she saw her mother any more, though that didn't happen as often as she'd like. It was lonely though, empty. Ninette had felt that; Rousseau only showed up when it was convenient for him, and the rest of the time it was just her, "That would be... manageable I think."

Although the expression on her face was trying to form itself into her usual smirk, Ninette had been unable to hide the gratitude that she actually felt. So in order to do so, she mumbled another thanks and moved to leave, getting out of her chair, and taking half a step before stopping, coming to a decision she hadn't even known she had been trying to make.

"Actually," the softness in her voice - practically hesitant - was a tone almost unheard of. "If I'm here, I mean might as well ask," she was trying to sound more like herself but she couldn't quite achieve the disinterest it required, "Can I ask you something?"

A small smile lifted the corner of Basil's mouth. She has gone back to a neutral tone but manageable... He could work with that. It would make Etta happier as well in all likelihood. Standing to give her space to leave he tilted his head slightly as she stopped. What else did she have to say?

Leaning against the desk again the Fae noticed her hesitancy especially in the tone of her voice. It sounded as if she were unsure about it. "You can ask me anything, sweetheart. I promise I will do my best to answer to the fullest extent I can." Basil stepped forward a step and laid a hopefully comforting hand on her shoulder. "I promise, Nine. You can ask me anything at all."

It wasn't so much about his ability to answer, as in her ability to ask. The question had been plaguing her for months now; warring with herself Ninette had been struggling to find some balance between being completely vulnerable, and yet among people, or safe, protected from pain, yet... bitterly alone. All her own struggling had done was send her swinging from one end of the spectrum to the other.

And neither extreme seemed to make her happy, something always wrong with both. She was at a loss as to where to settle.

The problem, however, was she had swung so far from vulnerable at the moment, Ninette didn't know how to ask the question, how to let her guard down enough to get advice from someone.

"I was just," glancing at the hand on her shoulder Ninette felt, perhaps not reassured but..."Are there some things... people it's worth risking getting hurt for? And even if there are... how are you supposed to know if it's really worth it for them? What makes them so special?"

What made him so special that she wanted to risk it again even though he had already hurt her once? She had already given Marcus an exception, and whether misunderstanding or not, she had been hurt. It had proved what she'd always felt, love or whatever you wished to call it wasn't worth it, wasn't going to work out...

Yet one late night conversation with the boy and suddenly she was questioning all that again. Ninette was completely lost again, a ship cut away from the dock, stuck in the eye of the storm. There was only one safety, one anchor.

Only one thing she knew.

"I don't want to be hurt."

"Oh Nine," Basil sighed wrapping his arms around the girl briefly in an embrace before stepping back to give the girl her space. He had seen she wasn't much of a touchy feely person and didn't think she'd welcome the touch, no matter how much he would want her to. "There are some people you just know you'd do anything for. Etta, the twins, you. I'd happily get hurt for any of you. Believe it or not, your grandmother and I have had our fair share of misunderstandings. But we've always worked through them. Though..." Basil gave a sheepish grin, "It usually ended up with me giving in and begging Etta for forgiveness on my knees." He coughed and straightened attempting to regain some pose. "Yes, well. Your grandmother is a formidable woman."

He reached out and smoothed back her hair affectionately. "Whether a specific person is worth the risk is something you can only answer for yourself. I can prevent people from hurting you, but sometimes you have to decide whether the risk of getting hurt is a risk you're going to take." Basil prodded gently below her left collarbone. "Something you have to decide in here. It was the same with me when I took the risk of asking Etta to marry me. I knew the risk of me getting hurt but I took that risk because I honestly loved her with every fibre of my being. The backlash of me getting hurt would be much worse than with other people though. My kingdom very well could have fallen apart in my despair had she rejected me."

The surprise at finding herself in an embrace - even a very quick one - was later replaced with slight amusement at the image the man had presented for her; although it countered much of the image he gave off within the school - the idea of a foreboding headmaster - it fit exactly with everything she knew of her grandmother. Sweet tempered and caring when she wanted to be Ninetta Fontaine did not let just anyone walk over her - and she made anyone want to move mountains just to stay in her favour.

"I always did want to be just like my Grandmama," she admitted with a soft smile, "I don't think I quite made it, though." Her grandmother took risks, she let herself get close to being hurt if she thought it was going to gain her something.

And she usually came out winning anyway. Look at her now, already happily married once, having one family, and she had managed to swing it to get another one on top of it. There were people in the world dying for just one family...

Ninette had always assumed she end up as one of those people; she could hardly see herself letting her guard down long enough to let a man stand around, and there was no need to even get her started on children.

"That seems like quite the fate for a Kingdom, all resting on the hands of their rulers love," her voice was soft when she finally broke her second wave of silence. His words bouncing in her head, confirming what she had already known and striking up a foreign emotion for her. If Ninette didn't know better she'd say it was fear.

But Ninette Fontaine didn't fear things; that was what the rumours said, that was the image she had spent years trying to create. In truth, there was many things Ninette feared - they just weren't the normal ones. Emotions, pain, heartache... loneliness. She feared all those things, she had just learned through years of practice how to pretend she didn't. She had gotten so good at pretending, she nearly believed that it was true herself.

"Love seems like a lot of work, for something that doesn't always work out." Never works out was what the bitter voice in her head echoed. She could still feel the tap of the finger over where her heart should be - she was again falling into the trap of believing her own rumours. Could it be true she didn't really have one at all?

The man couldn't help himself this time and brought the girl in for an embrace, holding her snugly against his chest. "You may not realize it but you are more like your grandmother than you realize. You are both strong women and I am proud to have you as a part of my family."

He smoothed her hair tenderly, more for soothing himself than her. "For my race finding our soulmate is our one true calling. We devote ourselves to other tasks and suffer through trials and tribulations but we are never truly complete until we find that one person." Moving Nine back to arms length but still keeping a hold of her he stated truthfully, "That's all I want for you, Nine. To be able to find your one. The one that can open up your heart and make you feel like you've never felt before."

"It may not always work out, believe me I know, but in the end it's worth it." Basil smiled and tapped a finger against Nine's nose. "You're an amazing young woman, sweetheart, and Etta and I are both very proud of you. Just put a little trust in yourself. Feelings aren't always bad things. You'll know when that special someone is worth everything you can give."

Ninette had found something that she wasn't sure what to do with. Sympathy, compassion, an embraces. The man was treating her as if she deserved to be treated like a human being, someone capable of giving compassion back.

As if her limbs were being tugged by strings, she returned the sign of affection almost awkwardly. He had answered her question, but it still hadn't helped her. She was still as lost as she had been before - as lost as she always felt.

Pulling back she looked at the man, green eyes appraising even as she felt like she wanted to bolt. Her mind, was in fact screaming for it, but she couldn't get her limbs to respond. Instead it was her mouth that opened and she could hear her worst fears tumbling out.

"And if I don't have a heart to open up? If I'm not worth giving to anyone?" Ninette, after all, had known the truth for a long time. She was damaged goods - she was damaged emotionally ever since Simon, ever since she had refused to move on, and she'd been throwing herself at anything attractive that walked her way. It was probably common knowledge now that there was no point in trying to get attached to Ninette Fontaine. After all, she'd give it out for free.

Sitting in the chair only recently vacated by Ninette the headmaster kept hold of the girl's hands, his thumb stroking absent mindedly over the knuckles of her hand. He wished that he could show the girl what he saw in her and what Etta saw in her, but unfortunately the man could not answer his own wishes.

"I know you have a heart. It's a strong, loving heart and I've seen it. I've seen how much you love your grandmother and I've seen you with the twins. You adore them." Basil looked up and smiled. "Someone that doesn't have a heart wouldn't behave like you do."

He squeezed Nine's hands gently. "And you are worth it. You are a beautiful, caring, and loving individual, sweetheart. You've just closed yourself up. Now I don't know what happened in your past to make you try and push everyone away from your heart but I do know that if you don't try and put that past to rest and stop letting it hold you back then you aren't going to be able to move on and live your life the way you want to live it."

It was sound advice, really a truth that she always knew. But that didn't mean she knew how to follow it. Ninette had been living her life so long in one way, that she did not know how to be any different. This was just who she was, who she had been for so long. Any other Ninette that there had been was dead and gone.

"Some things are easier said than done, don't you know that, Gramps?" Her bitter wall of defence was back up. Funny it hadn't taken all that long. Really that had been the longest it had been down since the girl could remember. "But, I suppose I should thank you for the advice anyway. It's not your fault I don't know how to do it, right?"

She gave a weak little smile, expression in her green eyes bitter, and detached.